I never want to fail you again. The strongest loves are the love we receive from our parents. I had to walk away from him. Shiva is the final hammer blow that snaps shut the iron link in the chain of a family history. So, as a non-Jew, if I was to be buried with my parents and relatives I would have to be embalmed and pay the explense of the casket and outer container. She didn't have to, but she did because you had a family, and when you love someone you do not give up on them.
You were named after your great grandfather, Charlie Morgan. I want to remember you. There is nothing you could have done to stop me. And what a beautiful woman you are! One day my ashes will be placed in an identical box and installed next to his. You wept so hard, it broke my heart as well.
The last time I saw you was in the chapel of rest. Every grand moment is a reminder of the loss. A missing piece, forever lost and irreplaceable. My daughters is 10, going on 30, so does at least amuse herself. I have attended many funerals - many different types- and I find embalming and viewing strange. You were one of people who was supposed to love me from the day I was born, but you didn't. And they incinerated their remains in fire like a garbageman burning waste.
My father fought himself as much as he fought with his superiors and the meter maids giving him parking tickets. It turned out you that thought it agreed with your position on capital punishment while I thought it supported my position. I shall ever miss him whenever I pay you a visit. It was your own very Jewish upbringing that engendered this paternal love in you. My prayer now is that our common Divine Father is taking you in His infinite paternal bosom, and that, from your heavenly perspective and station, you will move angelic forces to influence Jews contemplating cremation to think things through a notch more carefully. I don't relate to any religion. He and I shared something when I was a little boy: heart.
But surely you could still sit shiva after the cremation? It was your common sense and practical logic that guided you to the heights of success. I wish you so much love! You have a way of getting through the core of my heart and my entire being through your blogs. Emily will be able to cherish not only this moment but also this letter for the rest of her life. To see him, to talk to him for the very last time. I closed my eyes, tried to quiet the rest of the world. My heart goes out to you and your family.
Near where my parents are buried there is an empty grave with a grave-stone commemorating several people who perished in the Holocaust. I feel like I did the right thing. Your post reminded me of something my mother said to me once before she passed away. This must have been such a shock for you. After our phone call, I realised that was the first time in 44 years my Dad had said he loved me. Unfortunately, the body takes some time to decompose.
Mind you she could be a lot worse! Romana Serbia January 16, 2019 While reading this text it was like reading my own life story. Since your passing, I have corresponded with three fellow Jews asking me for advice. Let others hear it on behalf of your memory …. I opened your urn for the first time ever. Is private mourning not enough? I wish I never let you have the chance to talk to me or even meet me.
I know how you felt about Jewish traditions, how little stock you put by them. I have upheavals that make me sick. Today, it only seems right to break open the box of memories that helped suture the hurt in my heart. My suggestion is to buy a plot and grave-stone so you have a place to memorialize your father. Condolences Letter on the Death of father Address Date Dear Name , I am deeply pained to inform you that my father is no more. Remember how you had stacks of magazines — some more than one year old — that you vowed you would get to as soon as you had time? My dad wrote me a similar letter albeit a bit lighter in tone and gave it to me when I was like 16.
I have an immense amount of family and friends who do, and that is something you cannot say you have. I will always be trying. How could you not wake up every day hating yourself because of what you did, because I wake up every day hating you for it. I had something similar happen to me…only his voice came through my radio, not long after he died. Since when is expedient so important anyway? Many years later I became a mother and got a glimpse into what she meant. It has been more than five years since you died. I hope it brought you peace.